Stop Anxiety by Adjusting Expectations
So this week in review of the last few weeks I’ve been pondering about how I set myself up for failure through expectations of myself, that I impose on other people so I share with you some of my thoughts about expectations and how we need to give grace and mercy to ourselves.
Old expectations trigger your cortisol, but you can adjust them.
Anxiety is caused by our own expectations more than we realize. For example, a pothole in the road causes huge anxiety if you drive right into it, but if you see it in advance it’s manageable. So anxiety is caused by the expectation of a flat road when that fails to fit the facts.
Of course, expecting potholes all the time would not relive anxiety either. Realistic expectations are the key to a smooth ride. But how can our expectations be realistic when the world is unpredictable?
“When you stop expecting people to be perfect, you can like them for who they are.”
― Donald Miller, A Million Miles in a Thousand Years: What I Learned While Editing My Life
“We were promised sufferings. They were part of the program. We were even told, ‘Blessed are they that mourn,’ and I accept it. I’ve got nothing that I hadn’t bargained for. Of course it is different when the thing happens to oneself, not to others, and in reality, not imagination.”
― C.S. Lewis, A Grief Observed
Romans 8:28 ESV
And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.
Ephesians 2:8-9 ESV
For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast.